Ron Hart: Crazy comes to town

Still rocking the Jheri-Curl and traveling with 50 attractive female “bodyguards,” international nut job Mohamar Khadafi came to New York last week. In his defense, he must have thought that he would be asked to film a 1990s music video since Michael Jackson is now dead.

Always fashion-forward, Mohamar sported an especially haute couture outfit as he ranted before the U.N. General Assembly. His ensemble looked like a Snuggie he had BeDazzler-ed himself on the plane ride over from Africa. Having just bought 12 Snuggies from a TV infomercial, he seemed hypocritical when he denigrated American capitalism. If he keeps it up, he might catch the eye of the Obama administration and be made the Czar of Capitalism-Bashing.

He even pimped his camel for his arrival at the U.N., which again distinguished itself as the biggest waste of money since Michael Jackson’s last four nose jobs.

Like other short, pocket-thug leaders, Khadafi used all 90 minutes of his 15-minute time allotment to threaten other countries. He said, “If you want to invade me, then you may be killed.” Who is writing these guys’ speeches, Mr. T?

Of the many slights and disappointments suffered by Khadafi, none was as hurtful as not being allowed to pitch his tent in New Jersey. When New Jersey says you cannot come there, you need to take a long, hard look at yourself. It was fortunate for Mohamar that he ended up pitching his tent on the property of another man who knows no shame, Donald Trump.

Khadafi has a master plan to appear so bat-mess crazy that even we will not invade his country — and so far, so good. He was given a stage (and I do not know why the U.N. gives tyrannical despots the dignity of being able to address the world), so he grabbed the microphone and gave a rambling, self-aggrandizing, crazy speech. Now you know why his Secret Service code name is “Kanye West.”

In his speech, Mohamar again pushed the idea of merging the Israelis and Palestinians into a country he likes to call “Isra-tine.” I just hope the Nobel Peace Prize Nominating Committee is taking notice of Khadafi’s fine brainchild. Many found it troubling; I found the idea derivative and unoriginal. First, we already have such a place; it is called New York City. Second, we should never do anything proposed by a man in a Snuggie.

Khadafi was also smart enough to tie his fortunes to President Obama by calling him “my son.” Along with calling Hillary Clinton “that bitchy aunt,” this should really help him in the next landslide “election” he holds in Libya. Perhaps his percentage of the vote will increase from his previous 99 percent to a truly historic 100 percent.

President Obama also spoke at the U.N., where he was well recognized by the viewers of all of his recent prime-time TV shows. He told the assemblage of corrupt and shady third-world leaders to whom, for some reason, we give diplomatic immunity, “Don’t expect America to fix all of your problems.” Just for the record, Obama thinks he can fix all of our problems by socializing everything he can, but he just does not have the energy to apply his brilliant tax-and-spend strategy to the rest of the world.

Do not kid yourselves. This Obama guy has a plan for thuggish third-world leaders like Khadafi and Iran’s Ahmadinejad. He got funding to invade them approved in the last $780 billion stimulus bill passed by Congress. He was able to keep his plans secret by detailing them in an “Obama spending package,” thus ensuring that they would not be read by anyone in Congress or the media.

Ron Hart is a Southern libertarian and a professional investor. He writes his column weekly.

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